A Horse Named Bill
 
 C

Oh, I had a horse, and his name was Bill,
F

and when he ran, he couldn’t stand still
C G C

He ran away, one day, and also, I ran with him

He ran so fast, he could not stop
He ran into a barber shop

And fell exhaustionized, with his eye-teeth, in the barber's left shoulder

I had a gal, and her name was Daisy
When she sang, the cat went crazy
with deleriums, St. Vitis's, and all kinds of cataleptics

One day she sang, a song about
a man who turned himself inside out,
and jumped ... into the river, he was so very sleepy

I'm going out, in the woods next year
and shoot for beer, and not for deer
Well I am. . .Well I ain't ... I'm a great sharp shootress

At shooting birds, I am a bute
There is no bird, I can not shoot
In the eye, in the ear, in the teeth, and in the fingers

I went up in a balloon so big
the people on earth, looked like a pig
like a moue, like a katydid, like fly-zes, and like flea-zes

The balloon turned up, with its bottom side higher 
Fell on the wife of a country squire 
she made a noise, like a doghound, like a steamwhistle, and like dynamite
 
Oh, what could you do in a case like that

What could you do but stamp on your hat

or on your mother, on your tooth-brush, and everything that's helpless